Every family has traditions. Maybe you get a real tree every Christmas, or have a family reunion at a certain park every year with extended family.
Family traditions remind us of the good ol’ days… of simpler times… and of special memories.
My OWn Family’s Traditions
Growing up, I didn’t have a lot of family nearby. It was just me, my mom, and my dad.
Being Filipino, we had some unique family traditions, such as eating pancit (a noodle dish) on birthdays, and celebrating Noche Buena (Christmas Eve) with a huge feast.
The three of us also ate a lot of traditional Filipino foods when I was very young, things like adobo (chicken or pork in a salty, tangy adobo sauce), kare-kare (oxtail and veggies in peanut sauce), and lots of rice.
Traditions like these made me feel unique, and they gave me a strong sense of identity. They helped me understand who I was and where I came from.
Traditions for the Modern Family
So why are traditions important for today’s family?
Busyness (and technology!) creeps into our everyday life and can keep our families separated and disjointed. One way to reunite our families is by starting new rituals and by continuing old traditions.
Let’s explore what family traditions are, why they make our families stronger, and how to start new traditions.
WhAt’s a Tradition, Anyway?
A tradition, or ritual, is an action that you repeat at the same time or in the same way. It includes the stories, beliefs and customs that we pass on from one generation to the next.
Traditions and rituals are not the same as routines or habits. Instead, they have meaning, intentionality, and purpose.
Let’s look at an example. Drinking a cup of coffee on the way to work every morning is a routine. Sharing a pot of coffee with your spouse every Sunday morning before the kids get up is a tradition.
5 Reasons To Keep Our Family Traditions
Here are five reasons why we need to keep family traditions.
1. To Bind us Together
Spending time together is the core of any family ritual. As kids get older, they gain independence and want to spend time away from family. Keeping a special tradition will keep our kids centered and connected with the family.
Let’s not forget that special family traditions also help us connect with the older and younger generations! Grandparents are an important part of a young child’s upbringing. Traditions are an easy way for the old and young to bond with each other.
2. To Pass On Our Values
What lessons do you want your kids to learn? How about your grandkids?
Create a tradition around the things you value. The things that you want your children to remember and to teach their own children.
Our values may come from our culture, from our religion, or our worldview. We can use traditions as a way to pass on these values to the next generation.
3. To Create a Constant
Our lives are full of changes. We change jobs; we move to new houses; we go through seasons.
Having something constant, something that remains the same throughout these changes brings us comfort and security.
Traditions slow us down and help us to deal with changes from a place of familiarity.
4. To provide a sense of identity
Traditions teach us who we are and give us something to belong to.
We use traditions to teach our kids our family history, where we came from, who our family was in the past, and indirectly, who we can be in the future.
5. To Make Memories and Have Fun
Every year, the holidays make me look back and remember the good times we’ve had as a family. One of the main purposes of having family rituals is to have fun with your family and make memories!
What could be a better reason to start a new family tradition?
How to Start a New Family Tradition
Starting a new family tradition is simple.
Choose a tradition that resonates with you. Maybe it’s something you wished you did as a kid. Maybe it’s something you want to leave as a legacy to pass on to your kids and grandkids. Pick something that has meaning for you and your family.
Choose something you can actually do and be consistent with. If you don’t enjoy skiing, don’t plan a skiing trip every winter for the family vacation. Do something the whole family will enjoy.
Make it your own. Traditions from your childhood don’t have to be exactly the same now that you’re an adult. You don’t have to make fried chicken every Sunday afternoon just because Grandma did. (Although if you do, please expect me come for lunch every week.)
When to Let A Tradition Go
Family traditions are great as long as they still have meaning. Don’t be afraid to let the meaningless traditions go.
When a tradition no longer provides us joy and purpose, maybe it’s time to stop it and start a new one.
Our kids change, and our families change. Your teenager doesn’t want you to sing “Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star” to him anymore.
Similarly, don’t introduce traditions your family might not be ready for yet. Your toddler probably shouldn’t stay up until midnight to welcome the New Year!
Let your new family traditions reflect your family!
Whatever traditions or rituals you have should teach your kids to value what matters most, create a constant, provide a sense of identity, and be fun.
These are the things that will help your family to stay connected through life’s ups and downs.
What Are Your Family Traditions?
Leave a comment below and share your traditions! You just might inspire someone to start a new family tradition!
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